I was instructed to simplify and re-write this copy for Desiree’s landing page. Here’s what she sent me:
Hey everyone! My name is Desiree and welcome to my website! I have been a personal trainer since 2008. After being overweight myself, I’ve dedicated myself to living a healthy lifestyle, all while being a mom of five, running my own business, competing, and helping other’s achieve a variety of health and fitness goals. There is nothing more gratify then watching someone go through the emotional, mental, and physical changes that come about through clean eating and exercising. I am hoping that I can bring that same energy to those I do not train one on one. This will be a place where you can find daily workouts, nutrition tips, Q&A section, and daily motivation. My goal is not just to have you workout with me, but to educate you on health and fitness. Thank you so much for allowing me to be part of your journey! Let the JOURNEY begin!
Here’s how I reworked that:
Hello, and welcome to your first step towards living your super life! I’m a mom of five, who carves out enough time to run a business, compete [and podium] as a fitness model, attend my boys’ basketball games, and do the laundry. Think I’m a supermom? I’m not. Though I’ve been a personal trainer since 2008, and competing since 2009, I didn’t always look like this. After my first child, I did what most mom’s do: devoted myself to my child so much that I neglected myself. I became overweight, struggled with a low-body-image and wrestled with terrible self-esteem. But my story didn’t end there. Over the past 11 years I’ve learned how to maximize my results in the gym and minimize the time I spend there which allows me to live the life I love.
So, welcome to Desiree Nicole Fitness! Let me share with you the tips, tricks, and no-nonsense facts that will get you from being “#1 Mom” to being “#1 Mom With a Six-pack”! If I can do it, you can do it!